Streak to Win

Great Moments in Streaking

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  10. Jesus Streak

  This apocryphal streak has been the basis of several small and heavily persecuted Christian sects throughout history. An argument over the veracity of this streak as it is described in the so-called "Littlest Gospel" lead to the split between the Eastern Orthodox and Roman Catholic churches in 1504.

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  9. Hasdrubal's Alpine Streak

  Hasdrubal of Carthage and his army streak Italy to aid his brother Hannibal. Nero eventually crushes the nude warriors in the Battle of the Metaurus River. Some scholars believe this streak was the catalyst for the Third Punic War. A bawdy joke of the period makes reference to "Hasdrubal's Pubic War."

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  8. Utopian Streak

  Sir Thomas More streaks Martin Luther's town meeting to protest Reformation. Renaissance Humanism is born.

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  7. Napoleon's Surrender Streak

  Every man has his Waterloo.

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  6. Crump's Streak

  George William Crump defies convention and streaks Washington College (now Washington and Lee). Incensed college officials suspend Crump. Crump becomes Ambassador to Chile.

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  5. Livingstone Streaks Ujiji

  Stanley encounters Livingstone, who is doing a solo streak across modern-day Tanzania. They streak Lake Tanganyika in friendship. The Scramble for Africa begins. Everyone loses.

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  4. Gilded Age Streak

  Cornelius Vanderbilt, John D. Rockefeller, Andrew Carnegie, Henry Flagler, and J. P. Morgan streak across a tennis court paved with gold pieces, precipitating the Panic of 1893.

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  3. Tennis Streak

  Melissa Johnson becomes Wimbledon's first streaker, running across the court in nothing but an apron.

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  2. Branch Davidian Protest Streak

  The 1993 streak of David Koresh's compound represented the first attempt on the part of the U.S. military-industrial complex to use "hippie tactics" to fight domestic terrorism. A group of well-meaning nudists from San Francisco was recruited, trained, and released into the compound, as Peter, Paul and Mary played through the loudspeaker. All perished.

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  1 1/2. Conservative Streak

  Joe the Plumber, fresh out of the shower, thinks he hears the sound of Freedom being threatened by Radical Islam and inadvertently streaks a neighborhood block party. Taken for some kind of homosexual, he is beaten to death by good, hardworking Americans.

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  1. Hamilton College Varsity Streaking Team Defeats the NESCAC

  The tour to end all streaks.